Thanks to everyone who attended my art opening last night! To those of you who didn't make it to the event, here some FAQs about how it went:
Q. Were there lots of people at the opening?
A. Yes.
Q. Were any of them important?'
A. Yes.
Q. How much art did you sell?
A. The numbers aren't all in yet.
Q. Were any good-looking men there?
A. Omigod yes! The place was packed with them!
Q. What did you wear?
A. I wore a party dress from the Macy's teen department with a teeny tutu-like chiffon skirt. One guy said it looked like I was wearing a figure skating outfit. He said I should go to the Xcel Center and see if they'd let me compete in the ice skating contests. I seriously thought about doing that after the opening. See, I've been watching an old movie, The Wedding Crashers, and I've learned all these rules about being an event crasher. It would be fun to use the rules to try to pass myself off as an ice skater. I didn't have any figure skates with me, but I was wearing these pointy shoes with slippery soles and I could skid around on the ice and nobody would ever notice the difference.
Q. Well, you certainly have a lot to say about your outfit! But let's get back to your art career. How did it feel to have all those new paintings on display for the first time in public?
A. It felt like I was giving birth while hundreds of people watched.
Q. Gee, it sounds exciting! I wish I'd been there. When is your next art opening?
A. I'll keep you posted.